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Kelsey Darragh

title

My Journey

I used to be one of the most pessimistic and saddest humans on earth. I never used to live in the moment, except for those few occasions where I would look at my surroundings and say “hey, everything’s alright”.
I spent most of my time worrying about the future, or obsessing over the past and soon my time to aboard the depression and anxiety express arrived. At the beginning of this pandemic, I was signed off of work for two weeks with periods of “anxious states”.
During these two weeks, I took a deep look inwards, I asked myself all the great big questions of life and wondered who I was as a person, considered my self-identity and what my impression on others was like. After a heavy day of crying and deep thought, I cleared my mind and relaxed, almost in a meditative state I came to the sudden and combustible realization that my problem was that I constantly lived in fear. I never lived in the present.
If I wasn’t worried about my future, my work, my bills, my health, I was re-living all of my most embarrassing and traumatic experiences of adolescence and childhood over and over, stuck in an endless time loop of events that I physically cannot change or control, just living in fear.
Instantly, I felt as if a smog had been lifted from my vision, I cried some more and realized the truth in happiness, in growth, in healing is in the now.
The Power of Now is more than just a book title, it’s a philosophy, a gospel of truth and change.