yup

i am a great listener. you can talk to me if you want

hi... I feel like someone summoned me!

heya! how can i help u ...u can tell me if u need

meanwhile - our host replies.... how are u guys doing?

oh @Skylar thats a good one

hey... what's up?

busy with workloads... and certainly less depressed

I don't know how to chat privately

u can't chat privately here as it's not a function of the app

well, it's a public comment u can't really chat privately here.

we are all anonymous, so it doent matter, if u dont mind

if u want to talk privately u can use insta , telegram or email options of someone whom u want to talk

@25- I'm glad u r doing better🙂

thanx

ok it's a long story can I share?

proceed

yeah absolutely

yeah, you can

I don't know from where to start but let me tell u these one guy is sincerely loving me..but I don't have feelings on him

but I was in relationship with him for 2 yrs without feelings

thinking that I would get feelings on him

but I never got...and the main problem is my sister's husband and me fell accidentally in love

did u both start as friends? that's why u couldn't tell him about having no feelings?

well it's not accidental we both have true feelings on each other

I told him that I don't have true feelings on him but very late

actually I always wanted true love someone to love me

ofcourse he has on me

actually like 3 yrs we didn't express our love but we used to care a lot

when did u fall in love with u sisters husband? before or after marriage?

after marriage

I love my sister but my feelings for my sis husband is true

even he has same feeling

I never thought to express even he thought the same but in sudden outburst we both expressed

Unrelatable ques- does ur sister have any kids?

no

no kids

my problem is I have one person who loves me

but I truly have feelings on some other

u both should come of clean,yes there will be consequences but then u both can be together, at least

answr, sorry, if u dont mind:- hv u ever been physical with ur sis's husband or just fell in love?

we have never been physical

ok

I don't understand what to do

the only reason why I was in relationship for 2 yrs because I just wanted true love but I didn't get on him and so I was rude

but he is very loyal and sincere to me

he never scolded me but I have did it many times not even a single time he scolded me

have a clear conversation to sort things out as early as possible... we know initially it will be a bit emotional issue.. and heal gradually.. but its better to have transparency in family relations..

what is love according to u, tortoise?

my sister's husband loves me cares for me but our relationship will be there only for few months

that I can't even imagine

acc to me with love u can live the life only one person is enough

are u ready for confrontation?

actually we decided to stay and keep it as secret relationship as family is involved

life long we decided to be in secret relationship

how long are u going to keep it secret? 6 months, 1yr , or 2yr..? be realist for a bit!

but I truly love him each and every sec I think about him

I have to keep it no other option for me

am I cheating the guy who really loved me?

am I cheating my sister?

I never thought that he is also having same feelings on me but one day we both at a time expresed that day I can't even forget

can someone reply pls

I don't really want to say this but no sister would ever want to see her husband falling in love with her younger sister. well after all this she will be the one who will bear the impact most. also the more u hide it, the more u hide, the more wrong this is.

will ur sister's husband favour u (cooperate) at the time of confrontation (if).. what do u think?

it's better to come clean, at least u both will get to be together.

I agree but what about the feelings we both have

when my family knows this my sister will give divorce after that there will be no talks he told

no talks...? there will be... if ur indian then will not so simple

but we really have feelings on each other

it was a miracle in my life that we both expressed on one day

the thing is we want to maintain secret relationship like this forever even if I get married he cares for me

and the guy who loved me very sincerely doesn't know this

I don't want to hurt anyone I told the guy if my family accepts I will marry him at the same time I will be in secret relationship with my sis husband is this wrong?

yes it's very wrong, it'll be unfair to all 4 of u

that doesn't mean I don't love the guy and my sister's husband doesn't love my sister

i know it's wrong but the feelings I have on him are very true

not just attraction there is ntg attractive between us

@obsessedtortoise4 : have u and ur guy been physical?

no we haven't been physical

it means u havnt been physican neither with sis hubby nor with guy

*physical

yes

in this situation, you can't help everyone...

i think this is just an emotional trap.. u r trapped in.. and u hv to be foresighted

I feel im very emotional

@wakefulviper i also think so this is a bit emotional trap...

now my sis husb is far away from my sis so he texts me calls me and after few months my sis will go to that place and then there will be no talks

he said he will call me when he is alone and my sister even told me that he asks about me a lot

Yes

u have to be very very very sure that he is not playing with u

he said he will make situations tell my sister something and call my parents to see me

only then proceed to any desision

noo he is not like that all my relatives like him he is good guy

he told each and every secret of him

very bad secrets that we can't share with anyone he told me

he is my family member from 3 yrs I still remember how we used to make situations to meet just to look each other

he said I'm married and talking like this with u Is wrong but I couldn't hide my feelings

he never abused me never scolded me even if I argue for silly reasons he never told a word

actually I have love from both people I don't know whom to select

just a reminder - if u decide to confess ur truth.. do it together, keeping it a secret ,you will hurt more people for longer time

thanks for ur advice but we can't confess I don't think marriage is the ultimate thing for love we can be like this forever what I feel

atleast be foresighted.. what will happen if ur sister hv kids?

I asked him to marry me he said sure we will do it secretly

it's not just about marriage for u both... he is also at the same time emotionally cheating on his wife... which also happens to be sister.

what secretly... will he give divorce

Yes I'm afraid of my sister

no he won't give divorce

then it will be much more complicated and not worth

this is not the way a family or socity works

ull marry him secretly?? when he's still in married to ur sis, wake up to reality !

I don't know what to do

I agree that I'm making mistake the only thing Im afraid of is loosing him

that's not how things work, either accept ur love and come out or.... leave him- sorry this comes out as harsh

Yes I don't want to go against society all I need is true love may be emotionally connected let's see what happens

firstly.. kindly be clear on ur priorities.. in this case u have to choose only one...

is it my fault that I didn't get feelings on guy who loved me?

it's not about society... it's more about ur ethics.... just imagine if u keep this a secret for few more years.... and sister has kids.... what are u going to do? it will become only for complicated.. and end up hurting more people.

my sis husb is not there at that time when I accepted that guy

then what was diff in ur siss hubby than the guy

that u got oriented only towards him

I agree with what you are saying but Im deeply connected to him and it is true real pure love that is my problem

even I don't want to love my sis husb and cheat my sis but unknowingly I fell in love with him the way he cares me talks to me supports me

in practical maintaining a secret relationship is very tough and not correct I know but the love I have on him is what I'm talking about

i agree with @falcon25 ... aisa kya alag tha siss hubby me... so that we also learn from this situation

but that is not a excuse... imagine urself in ur sister's place... how will u feel? ur hubs and sis having a affair behind her back..

there was no spl thing in my sis husb infact the guy will be handsome than him

i think ur siss hubby was more emotional sympathetic to u

so should I leave my sis husb?

am i ryt

my life changed when I met him that is the only reason I got connected to him

@wake @25 - these kinda cases actually exist, happened in my locality too a few yrs back, only fault was that younger one actually became pregnant... wanna know what happened ? today many people(present gen)don't even know she existed.

sympathetic what do u mean by that

I would like to change that s why I told my story

@skylar.. what are the parameters of these emotional connections are these backed up by emotional sympathy

in our unconcious mind that we dont notice?

thanks everyone for listening and expressing ur opinions

@25-hmm.... there are many... I don't want really say here... it's obvious many things here are missing

i am interested in these topics vry much

what topics? @ 25

how these unconcious emotional intrepetationleads to misunderstanding and even delusions about oneself

interesting? isnt it?

i think thats the root cause of this case as well.. do u agree

they are complicated... u'll need to study these in depth basis of the case . it differs with person to person

ya

have u studied or researched these..

yeah it's seems like that... a couple of things mentioned here surely directs towards that.

towards what may I know pls?

no I just wanted to know

in case u have forgotten... I'm just a high school graduate lol. but when I hear these cases... they don't end well.

@obsessedtortoise if u know this in depth then 30 percent of ur problem will solved.. i guess

tell me certain things - Tortoise... yeah I'm not judging things here... ohk? but it just seems.. like that

pls tell me

no no I'm not thinking like that

I just wanted to know is it abnormal or normal

normal it can happen to anyone

would u like discuss this on insta...? after sometime ,my phone is dying here 😅

im sorry I would like to chat here

ok no problem

that's fine too.... I'll come here after 10 I guess... is that ok with u?

normal?? then why I'm feeling depressed

yeah ok

depression in these situation is also normal but dont overthink it

the only one person on whom I got true love I should leave u know how hurting that would me

*would be

my problem is I want to love someone truly that's it

the only reason this situation obsessively manifests in ur mind, because u r experiencing true love (or it seems to be) for the FIRST time in life... i guess...

so its normal dont worry

Yes first time

previously I was in relationship with that guy where I never felt such feelings

also u havnt expirenced intimacy as well... this is also a factor

u just want a true love whome u can rely upon for life....

in chats we were so close

Yes exactly

in this situations u have to be very much carefull

in what

see I have no friends but very good family I have I used to feel alone at school so I used to accept those who love me

and if someone shows little care I used to connect to them a lot

ohhk

but only if I like them if I don't like them I accept them but don't behave well

this is my problem

I would say rectify ur feelings...its seems like u r trying to fill that emotional void and emotional intimacy, by accepting anyone who shows some affection to u.