how?

I don't trust anyone. bcz they are sad too.

I need a tight hug.

I faced the same. And later realized that this is life. Ups and downs. But it's upto you to decide what priority you give to them. Just recently, I took a firm decision. I will never cry. No matter what, I'll always be happy and confident. No matter what. Even if I feel like crying, I'll take a deep breath and remind myself about my new found confidence. And guess what, it's been a day since I made this firm decision, and it's actually going pretty well. I haven't cried even once in the latest day. So what I realized is that your take on things matters. The way YOU react to your ups and downs matters, and believe me, nothing else matters. AND there's no other solution. It's only you who can heal yourself. Change is slow, maybe it can take decades or years, but the small progress you make adds up to your ups in life, and hence it only keeps getting better. You just need to take that one step. With determination.

yaa You are right, Only we can heal ourselves. Only we can come over by the mess we have created. we can't be strong always, as we can't be weak always. sometimes we want to show our weaknesses, our problems, our fears our trauma to someone. I am facing this problem since 2019.I used to hospitalized when it's become out of control. I am not someone who can easily share what is running in my mind to someone. But I think this platform is safe. No one get to know about the time I am facing. I need help without making someone else sad too.

I'll try to express my feelings, stress or fears.

you can always express yourself here. everyone's here to help, ^_^

ok