I'm questioning myself anymore I can't hide it. No matter what I do/say I always make a big mistake. I hate being a 'slow learner' because at this point I don't know if I should still continue public speaking. I don't usually vent because I don't like to disturb others but now I have no choice but to speak up. All of my families has the attention of all my siblings. Well as a middle child I feel left out even though I worked hard and smart. After a mistake and not being on another round in my public speaking competition, I wanna hurt myself so bad to the point that I had a breakdown again. It's hard to accept that I'll never be good as the others even though I tried my very best to get recognized...
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I'm questioning myself anymore I can't hide it. No matter what I do/say I always make a big mistake. I hate being a "slow learner" because at this point I don't know if I should still continue public speaking. I don't usually vent because I don't like to disturb others but now I have no choice but to speak up. All of my families has the attention of all my siblings. Well as a middle child I feel left out even though I worked hard and smart. After a mistake and not being on another round in my public speaking competition, I wanna hurt myself so bad to the point that I had a breakdown again. It's hard to accept that I'll never be good as the others even though I tried my very best to get recognized...

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