My boyfriend and I broke up. It was a mutual decision because of our long distance we both accept...

Question

bearwiththickhead · Answer

if it was mutual, then why are you feeling that way

bearwiththickhead · Answer

did you do it just to please him

growinggirl · Answer

It was mutual because we both knew we could never be together but I just can't get over him

bearwiththickhead · Answer

why not?

growinggirl · Answer

Because I genuinely loved him his presence made me feel like I could achieve anything in this world. Be will always be the love of my life

solidpolenta5 · Answer

I totally get this feeling. I'm going through something similar myself

growinggirl · Answer

Let me know if you find something that helps you get out of this feeling cuz I can't take it anymore. Can't believe a strong person like me is seeking help online

bearwiththickhead · Answer

Yeah, what happened is your self esteem has been disturbed. Ask yourself, was he playing with words too much? Did he let your feelings down at times? Did you ever ignore yourself when you're with him? If the answer is yes, then you're alright, you're just unable to judge him for his full self rather you're charmed by him pretty badly.

bearwiththickhead · Answer

And it's not a gender thing, people do that to each other all the time, men, women, all sorts of people, irrespective of gender.

bearwiththickhead · Answer

You know, you're letting yourself down by not judging his full character. And its more depressing when you let yourself down for someone who won't ever feel what you feel.

growinggirl · Answer

I don't understand why I can't get over him when we only dated for 2 months. I dated my ex for 2 years yet my last breakup went smoothly and honestly my 1st boyfriend was way hotter than this one but still I can't get over him

growinggirl · Answer

Trust me I love him to an extent that I can be in a long distance relationship with him forever

bearwiththickhead · Answer

Yeah, you're right, you can handle this. But why tho? what's that guy got that nobody else got?

growinggirl · Answer

I don't know when I am with him I feel like only the two of us exist people say I am out of his league but to me he is literally the most handsome man in this entire universe

growinggirl · Answer

That's why I have not been able to move on from him I badly need some advice to move on

bearwiththickhead · Answer

you should make amends, thats the only way out of this quicksand, what do you look for in a man?

growinggirl · Answer

Everything that's he's got is what I look for in a man

growinggirl · Answer

Ahh! I am screwed fr will I ever be able to rid of this feeling

bearwiththickhead · Answer

yeah, you sound like a living love letter. No fr, genuinely, what is it? is it a thing or thought?

growinggirl · Answer

Wdym?

bearwiththickhead · Answer

If we figure out what caused you to fall so deep, we might be able to figure out how to get you out

growinggirl · Answer

I don't know what made me fall for him. I just fell for him I can't think of anything in particular

bearwiththickhead · Answer

Yeah, how old are you?

growinggirl · Answer

19

bearwiththickhead · Answer

you're doing just fine. there's an emotional gap created after he left, try identifying it and filling it with healthy emotions

growinggirl · Answer

I had dated a guy for 2 years but I never felt sad when we broke up then why is it different this time especially with someone I dated just for 2 months

bearwiththickhead · Answer

People tend to show affection in different ways, maybe this one had a different way, doesnt mean that the limit. You'll find someone else who will make you even feel more special, just like you found this guy who made you completely forget the last one. You fall to get up again. Keep movin

growinggirl · Answer

I hope I find someone who I'll love more than this guy but when I think he'll replace me someday it breaks my heart. I can't imagine spending my life with anyone but him and I can't even imagine him being in love with someone else as much as he was in love with me

bearwiththickhead · Answer

why would he replace you, people replace things they buy, now if you were not for sale, how could he have had you and if he didn't buy you, how could he replace you? make sense?

bearwiththickhead · Answer

you're sounding like you cant see anything else but this one thing that you think you can't replace. Maybe you guys didn't have that mutually levelled understanding. And this happens when people think very highly of themselves, do you think the guy is going to be extremely successful one day and doubt your ability to succeed magnificently?

growinggirl · Answer

By replace me I mean he'll get a girlfriend someday and they'll be happy together like how we once imagined we would spend our life together

growinggirl · Answer

It's true that I can't see anything but him. I just feel nobody's ever gonna make me feel the way he did. I know it's a terrible thing to say but I hope he never falls for anyone as much as he did for me

bearwiththickhead · Answer

hang on, how intimate were you in your 2 month relationship? was it purely mental or did you hurt yourself physically as well

growinggirl · Answer

We were on the talking stage when we met each other irl. Then he moved back to his country and yea we were quite intimate and also sexted

bearwiththickhead · Answer

so when did it start to go bad for you

growinggirl · Answer

Right after we called it quits

bearwiththickhead · Answer

im how did you guys think its should no longer be

growinggirl · Answer

Because of the distance. We startec dating cuz we were so in love that we never thought of how we would be together in future but when realization struck us we decided to break up before we get more attached to each other

bearwiththickhead · Answer

Wow, that is a very genuine thing to do. You should be happy it didn't get to a point where it would hurt. You should get a pibb, it'll make you feel good.

growinggirl · Answer

I still hurts it hurts a lot and that's exactly what surprises me how can I be so hurt when we only dated for 2 months.

growinggirl · Answer

What's a pibb?

bearwiththickhead · Answer

A cabonated drink, pepsi-cola hello?

growinggirl · Answer

Omg I am literally drinking coke rn but it doesn't help

growinggirl · Answer

I feel like I am going crazy I want him so bad

bearwiththickhead · Answer

do a chug, do a chug

bearwiththickhead · Answer

yeah, you won't go crazy i bet a chug on you

growinggirl · Answer

I am underage for a chug

bearwiththickhead · Answer

what underage

bearwiththickhead · Answer

where are you from

growinggirl · Answer

Wdym by chug? drinking right?

growinggirl · Answer

I am from India

bearwiththickhead · Answer

where was this guy from

bearwiththickhead · Answer

you can chug a cola can, don't you know man

growinggirl · Answer

The states

growinggirl · Answer

I thought you meant to chug liquor

bearwiththickhead · Answer

wow, i Just told you reminisce the good ol cola days, back to the childhood when oo laa ways was a thing, why would i mess that up involving liquor, ykwim, it's figurative

growinggirl · Answer

Oh I didn't think of it that way! Like I said my mind isn't working rn

bearwiththickhead · Answer

i suggest you sleep on it, you can come back in the morning

growinggirl · Answer

I've lost sleep and appetite since 2 months that's why I am here seeking help online ahhhh! I never thought I would have to go to such an extent to get over someone

bearwiththickhead · Answer

why did you think he is your forever though? did you have an amarican dream that woke up when you met him?

growinggirl · Answer

Oh no not at all infact I used to live in America myself I came here because of some family problem

bearwiththickhead · Answer

why were you there?

growinggirl · Answer

It's not because he was American or he was white guy like I said my first boyfriend who was Indian was more hot and attractive than this American one but I don't why I can't bring myself to forget him

growinggirl · Answer

I was born and raised there

bearwiththickhead · Answer

yeah, did you save up that imagination for someone special for a long time?

growinggirl · Answer

No that was not the case

growinggirl · Answer

Where are you from

bearwiththickhead · Answer

india

growinggirl · Answer

Oh! I am from Mumbai btw and you?

bearwiththickhead · Answer

Yeah, it will not be cool to violate privacy policy of all members of this secure community

growinggirl · Answer

umm np

growinggirl · Answer

hmm what's your ID?

bearwiththickhead · Answer

that contradicted real bad

growinggirl · Answer

Mr fact plug?

bearwiththickhead · Answer

yep

growinggirl · Answer

You're a guy?

bearwiththickhead · Answer

oh, is that a problem

bearwiththickhead · Answer

you tought i was a girl, idk if that's a compliment or not

growinggirl · Answer

Oh no that's not a problem don't get offended but the way you were talking wisely I thought you must be a mature girl

bearwiththickhead · Answer

that's not even stereotyped yet

growinggirl · Answer

Wait I'll follow from my fake account

bearwiththickhead · Answer

cool

growinggirl · Answer

yea but all the guys I know would probably laugh and say oh it's nothing you're upset over such a stupid thing and I liked talking to you cause you seemed mature so I thought you were a girl

bearwiththickhead · Answer

oh, yeah, no doubt about the percentage of those

bearwiththickhead · Answer

you know they say that if you've never walked past a door, you'll never know what's behind it.

bearwiththickhead · Answer

now figure why i am on this app taking a different approach to this when all I have to say is fuckit

growinggirl · Answer

I'll be honest I have said fuck it and felt better but it only lasts for like an hour and then I am back to my old self

bearwiththickhead · Answer

if wisdom was sold, it would never see the face of humanity again, the wise guy will buy it all and tell the world there's no such thing

growinggirl · Answer

I don't know if quotes are gonna help me rn

bearwiththickhead · Answer

yeah, i think you've been outsmarted, over charmed, mildly exposed, mildly shamed, little wronged, little judged, somewhat mistreated and most of all you misunderstood a fling for THE THING.

growinggirl · Answer

I wish someday I realise that it was just a fling and move on until then I'll probably be scarred

bearwiththickhead · Answer

i think you could use some kind of victory right now, go for some competition and win

growinggirl · Answer

Hmm I'll try that

I feel like to die!

Confused, Hurt