I can understand that it must be really difficult for you but, don't blame yourself for anything. Start prioritizing things in your life and work accordingly. You are going to take the best decision for yourself that's why focus on your growth.
ye I have the same problem but not studies jus lonely terribly lonely :( it's like u check on your people. it if u don't they do t even know you exist I Ve get those issue s too. the fact that I do what I don't like makes things worse.