(2)I can't stand out in any manner.. I used to be an extrovert and now I am just a nobody... my other friends are having quite fun.. they are having crushes.. they are having fun and even trying to talk.. ( now people might say I should try to talk so here is what happened..) - I made a joke earlier when one of my friend was talking to someone and they looked at me all weirdly.. and a girl didn't say bye to me but did say it to my other two friends.. I am just so lost..

(3) also I have taken maths which is really hard for me... I couldn't understand a SINGLE a SINGLE thing which made me more depressed.. I was like the worst in the class.. truly I just wanted to die there. why am I like this? I hate myself. I couldn't get some attention and now I am whining. there are actually moments of fun which I can enjoy.. but I don't have the energy to do it.. I just can't enjoy. I just can't be happy

(4) and watching my friends to have all the fun while I am suffering like this truly makes me more sad. I want to have more fun too I am a kid. I want to enjoy things. I want to create memories. I don't want to live like this. please help me please God. why do I have to be a person like this? why? why? why can't I stand out? why can't I just live?

hey it's just ur first day at the school so chill....u still have many things ahead of u

and remember friendships aren't made in one day it takes time

Hey buddy! Calm down! You know what, I relate with you! Starting off at a new place surely does come with lots of insecurities and I've battled them since last few months, and kind of still going through every single feeling you've mentioned. But what I realised is that, give it time! Time heals, Believe me! Maybe not completely, but it surely does heal! It's been a few months since I'm studying at a new place too, and tbh, I'm not sure how many of my classmates wouldn't mind me calling them my "friends". And I do feel sad about this because well, I'm just as emotional as you seem to be, and expect a lot from others. But what I've realised is that people like you and me spend so much of time in such thoughts, when everyone else, for example, that girl who didn't wish you good bye, don't give a shit about all this and probably have no idea about all this, AND had no intentions of making us feel like this. But you and I have a really turbulent mind, which runs all around the universe almost 20 times per day, and highlights all the so called negative things or moments, which aren't even supposed to be negative! Think about it. Rationally. Straining my mind on this helped me to stop caring about these things to some extent, and I really hope it helps you too! Again, think about it! You're being negative for no reason! You just need to calm down your turbulent mind. Maybe by thoughts like, "I don't need anyone to survive! I'm confident on my own and I'm gonna do this which I never did before. I was an extrovert once, I'm gonna be one again. I don't care about others' actions or gestures, I'll be so confident on my own, that they'll get insecure of me, just like I feel insecure of them right now. I'm gonna show them, and live my life!" GO LIVE YOUR LIFE AND STOP CARING ABOUT OTHERS, SOMEDAY THEY'LL PROBABLY BE MILES AWAY FROM YOU AND YOU WOULDN'T STRAIN YOUR MIND LIKE YOU'RE DOING RIGHT NOW! IN THE END, IT'S ONLY YOU!!!