break up because of family issue

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Relationship Issues

General Query

I am in a relationship with someone..we both love each other and we belongs to same caste..after that we decided to tell our parents about this..but then we realised that we both are having same gotra..my parents rejected this relationship outrightly bcz of gotra issue..and also the boy's family is not that rich or settled.. My family won't accept this relation at any cost bcz they follow all the society rules being in a joint family.. We both were suffering like anything..I don't have courage to ask my family again n again or convince them.. Bcz of all this, now I am thinking to get married as per my family's choice just bcz I can't live in such situation..but he is not ready for this and he is very sad.. What should I do in this situation?

Summer

5 Answers
rkaka
I understand that you must be going through a lot of pain which is understandable after putting so much into a relationship. These are tough times for you and I hope you come out of it stronger
avid_reader
Hey. I'm not quite familiar with the customs and traditions here ("gotra issues"), so I don't really have any suggestions for you. But I hope and pray things work out well for you and everyone involved. Until then, stay strong :)
Ifasinash
Hi Summer. I understand how challenging and difficult this situation is for you. While I can't tell you what to do, no one can, as it's a choice you have to make. But let's think of a few things first before you make this crucial decision. I'd like you to practice some deep breathing as it will help you calm down and think clearly. Emotions can often cloud our judgement, and for a big decision like this, you need a clear mind. You know your family, you know your relationship better than anyone. Do you love this person? Does he love you as deeply as you love him? Is he the right person for you? Is he the kind of person you want to spend the rest of your life with, someone who will be a good father to your children? I understand socioeconomic status plays the most important role in marriages in our culture, but all that aside, if you don't believe in your relationship, then it's not worth fighting for. Love isn't the only thing, you have to figure out if he is the right person for you. If you decide that he is, then you can decide how you would approach your family. Find a way to show them why this relationship is right for you, that this would make you happy. I hope this helps. I hope you find the happiness you deserve. And remember, no matter what decision you make, you will be okay. It might hurt now, but you will be okay. Good luck!
yolo
Hello Summer, The major reason we love someone is that person makes us happy. While in a relationship we do not take into account a lot of things like finances, future planning, living with parents, etc. But after marriage you can no longer avoid these things and the chemistry between you two alone will no longer be the major factor of your happiness. So before making any decision consider all the aspects and also try to make him understand about all these. If he is living in denial then are you sure you want to spend your life with someone who cannot think rationally. You know your partner better than anyone. Solution will come only through dialogues and I wish you make a right decision.
Rahul
You want to ask that what if we don't Marry ? So it's hard definitely but after your breakup you will be more mature person , time heals everything with positive approach , I too gone through this emotion but now I don't fall into this hope & disappointment cycle ..you need to make a strong decision by not connecting with him anymore in case there is no chance of marriage .. Heartbreaks need not to be painful rather celebrate the time that you spent with him .feel free to talk 9929296131