why my parents are not like any other tipcal parents why

Question

peaky04 · Answer

hey what happened?

humoroustortoise7 · Answer

why what happened

guiltystork0 · Answer

my parents are not like usual couple

guiltystork0 · Answer

know what my family is broken

guiltystork0 · Answer

completely broken

Shivaang · Answer

broken in what?

guiltystork0 · Answer

like my mother having an affair with someone else

guiltystork0 · Answer

and my father is alcoholic

guiltystork0 · Answer

my father doesn't earned much my mother is the one who looks up to everything

guiltystork0 · Answer

and she and my father they never talk nicely to each other when ever thet talk they just fight

guiltystork0 · Answer

my mom insulted my father today

guiltystork0 · Answer

and I'm feeling so bad that he have to see everything in this life

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'm a girl

peaky04 · Answer

don't worry everything will be alright, try to talk to them and make them understand to maintain a balanced life with each other

Shivaang · Answer

What you are asking is clearly in front of your eyes

guiltystork0 · Answer

what

guiltystork0 · Answer

@ peaky you know i feel like why me and my brother have to see this like you can't not even understand what I'm feeling right now

guiltystork0 · Answer

it's killing me

peaky04 · Answer

yes, you are the one suffering but still everyone finds a hope to life , to resolve everything so try to make them understand with your efforts if they still aren't understanding then

guiltystork0 · Answer

you know now I'm having thoughts like i wish my father die so that he doesn't have to see all this and listen shit every time

peaky04 · Answer

don't say such things ,

peaky04 · Answer

try to find a solution.

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'm feeling terrible right now and feel so like i just can't explain but father had nothing all his life and like why why it's just written in our destiny to see all this

peaky04 · Answer

its okay to feel that way after going through all of this , Do one thing rn just calm yourself down

peaky04 · Answer

try deep breaths and calm down , if you want to cry , just cry vent it out and you'll feel relaxed.

guiltystork0 · Answer

i have grown up just looking this

guiltystork0 · Answer

but I'm feeling guilty

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'm not standing up for my father

peaky04 · Answer

why do you feel guilty?

peaky04 · Answer

in your view what does standing up for him means ? means what actions you think you can take

guiltystork0 · Answer

atleast i should have told my mother to not to talk rudely to my father today

guiltystork0 · Answer

she doesn't understand how she speaks badly

peaky04 · Answer

so why didn't you stopped her from saying those harsh words to your father?

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'm so done seriously people see me like i have no worries but only i know how my life is upside down

peaky04 · Answer

talk to her then, try to explain her how she should interact in the house.

guiltystork0 · Answer

i told as much as i can and even after that all so i told her not to talk badly to my father

guiltystork0 · Answer

but still I'm feeling guilty

peaky04 · Answer

everyone does the same dear, no one shows the upset life, painful life in public or to the ppl , we only express that side at our home or to our close friends

peaky04 · Answer

its okay you've tried, it's not like you didn't even tried , so don't blame yourself

guiltystork0 · Answer

i can't even said in my house because my problem start only from my house

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'm family is like this only all my life

peaky04 · Answer

yes I can understand how painful it must be for you , that you are not able to express yourself at home because of such conditions

guiltystork0 · Answer

you know that why i tried to find love from outside but i don't know how my destiny is even my friends are also all selfish

peaky04 · Answer

happens with other ppl too but it doesn't mean you don't make new friends or try to express at home..

peaky04 · Answer

life is hard for everyone just the situation is different in everyone's case.

peaky04 · Answer

if you are adult and working or independent then you have some freedom which is financial freedom. One option can be like distance yourself or shift to other city for job or study

peaky04 · Answer

so that you aren't bothered with all of this , but this will make the situation worse like for your father and brother as you said earlier

guiltystork0 · Answer

but I feel my father is dieing every day with this his just breathing not living

guiltystork0 · Answer

yeah

peaky04 · Answer

talk to your father in private just make him talk, like how he feels why is he not expressing himself

peaky04 · Answer

I think father and daughter share a good bond than a son and father

guiltystork0 · Answer

it's not like my mother is bad or anything it's just they just can't be on talking terms

guiltystork0 · Answer

he'll just never gonna share anything

peaky04 · Answer

I'm not stating that your mom is bad in any way , she might be correct in her thinking like sometimes we act according to situation so we think that we acted correctly in that phase but when viewed from others perspective you know that the person made a mistake by taking this step

peaky04 · Answer

have you tried talking to your father in private like only the two of you?

guiltystork0 · Answer

no but We have told him many times like please stop drinking and all and he says he'll not but he never stands on his words

guiltystork0 · Answer

and he wastes money on drinking and many times doesn't give enough money in the house so my mother gets angry

peaky04 · Answer

okay, try to talk to him or make him understand by his friends or family members

peaky04 · Answer

ohh that's a serious problem, he need to stop drinking

guiltystork0 · Answer

i don't understand why god has written our life's like this

peaky04 · Answer

don't blame on destiny or god , the things which happens with us are our deeds , like not in this life but the previous one

peaky04 · Answer

don't worry everything will be alright

humoroustortoise7 · Answer

yeah I am sure you can handle this very well and I agree @peaky04 try to communicate with your father and make him express himself because I guess something is bothering him no one drinks such a way with out reason

guiltystork0 · Answer

he drinks to forget the pain

peaky04 · Answer

make him talk and then he might stop this or try to avoid it at least

humoroustortoise7 · Answer

can understand but atleast he needs someone to talk

guiltystork0 · Answer

he's not that type of person who is ready to talk and he'll not even now i know his 51

peaky04 · Answer

I'm not saying just pretend like his buddy but atleast you can comfort him , and make him release that his drinking is bothering the whole family and making you worried about his health

peaky04 · Answer

I'm saying just talk about this not like what are the problems , ofc you are his child he's not going to share everything rightaway

humoroustortoise7 · Answer

you know what I guess even if my father won't say a word if something is bothering him because he thinks he can take it but it's our responsibility to understand and talk ...you can atleast assure him that everything will work out and try a little bit to make him speak on that topic so he can feel that he atleast have you who cares for him.

guiltystork0 · Answer

i understand what you are trying to say

guiltystork0 · Answer

yeah I understand

peaky04 · Answer

yes just make him feel comfortable and supported, you can do that right?

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'll try to make him feel better

guiltystork0 · Answer

yeah

peaky04 · Answer

and be brave like you have been from before , everything will be alright,

humoroustortoise7 · Answer

yeaah you can always vent to us but be brave and calm at home

peaky04 · Answer

one more thing, try some meditation for your peace of mind, like you must be having alot of thoughts and disturbed days , so just give it a try

guiltystork0 · Answer

thank you for saying this I'm a brave girl I've come so far without anyone

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'll try meditation

peaky04 · Answer

yes you are a brave girl and you are strong enough,

peaky04 · Answer

yes give it a try , to calm yourself down . There are also techniques like box breathing for instant relief from anxiety and stress

guiltystork0 · Answer

you don't know how much anxiety i have like in my office few days ago i had a anxiety and i can't even breath

peaky04 · Answer

yes then try box breathing its really helpful

peaky04 · Answer

and if possible try to engage yourself in some Pooja , like chanting a mantra daily or a stotras smtg like that to keep yourself happy and calm

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'm doing this but then after somedays I'm became lazy i can't do constantly

peaky04 · Answer

try to maintain it , consistency is the key

guiltystork0 · Answer

like my laziness is just

peaky04 · Answer

happens still try to maintain it

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'll try

guiltystork0 · Answer

I'm feeling good now as I vent out all my pain thanks for listening to me

peaky04 · Answer

yes , happy to help bye

What to do when you feeling lonely around people you have to live with

Gaslighting