i don't know wht to do.. i just feel like suicude evry tym. i had a relationship for 3 yrs which i broke just few months ago coz he strtd abusing me.. this was not the first time.. this was continued frm lst 1 n half yrs.. i kept on forgiving him coz i was deeply in live with him.. but he took me for granted and day by day his abusive languages increased for me.. he insulted me in frnt of evryone.. i was not able to come out of tht relatnship alone.. then smone i knw strtd talking with me last yr... i knw him but he was not aware of anything.. we just talked casually.. slowly i strtd sharing with him abt myself n also i sharwd with him abt my toxic reltnship frm which i wntd to come out.. so he helped me to come out of tht reltn and he said tht he has fallen fr me... i could nvr loved him coz i was nit completely out of my past relation.. it was just tht i had broked all the links with him.. i continued talking with this n frnd.. we met thn he kissed me.. i was so alone n depressed tht evn i needed a ti8 hug n a deep kiss.. so inspite of not living him i didnt refused him to kiss me.. after tht i came to knw tht this guy was double dating with me.. he already had a relatn fr 6 yrs in past n still continued and also did all this with me.. he moulded me in his buttery words tht he was innocent n i forgived him fr this.. but again he repeated the same thing.. after forgiving we again met kissed n pampered each other so much but he again repeated the same thing.. we used to b in the video cll for the whole day n ni8 n now i dnt knw tht whether i love him or not but its vry difficult fr me to frgt this prsn.. again i have to live alone... i just want to die.. there's no hope of li8 in my life..