Hi Arshiya123,
yes, its difficult what's happening and people are losing it by maintaining social distance. But we have to also remember that it's for our own good. Coming to your friends, you can try to meet a friend at a time from a distance instead of all together. don't feel lonely even your friends must be going through the same. Just try to do video call and stay in touch.
hansa_shaunik
1
The pandemic has dramatically changed everyones life. You are not alone.
It's a very lonely experience. What do you feel is now missing between you and your friends? What hold you back from having the same relationship with them?
Arshiya123
1
@HansaShaunik
My frnds are not same like before when we were in same school... After school ended... We are different clg... Different subject... So their priorities are changed...
hansa_shaunik
1
I see. College can be a huge change. Have you tried to connect? What happens when you do?
Arshiya123
@Hansa Shaunik
they didn't see my msg or they reply me lately or they are busy with their bf or gf
hansa_shaunik
1
Sometimes people grow apart when distance increases. Life has dramatically changed for all of you. Everyone seems to be responding to that change in their own way.
If I may ask, how has your experience of college been? Are you happy where you are?
Arshiya123
@Hansa Shaunik
Honestly saying... There is no soo close frnd in my clg... Sometimes i feel if i would have a bf With whom i can talk at the end of the day to share my feelings... & i just wish
if i could have a warm hug from him to feel the peace & happiness...
But i don't know why i can't find my love...
Though a boy(good friend) of my clg wants to date me... But when i was chating with him... At first he talked about physical relationship... So i don't trust him & told him let's get to know each other... Now He has agreed... But It will take a long time to trust him... I don't know what to do...
Ishita_2203
Hey
Ishita_2203
@Arshiya123 same thing happened with me yrrr will you be my best friend so that we can share everything
Ishita_2203
Message me on Instagram @Ishita_2203
Annony
The same thing is happening with me too. See we're now adults and everyone is having responsibilities. They're not available for us anymore. We have to may ourselves happy somehow. Try managing diary or just put down your thoughts in your notes or anywhere. You'll feel little better. And all I have realized is since this age, we'll be loosing many of our friends. I too feel left out sometimes but try finding alternatives and choose happiness. Sorry if I said anything wrong, please don't get offended. Stay happy and healthy:)
hansa_shaunik
Arshiya, it seems like your desire to be in a relationship is not based on healthy grounds. Seeking a partner simply because we are lonely can hurt you and the other person in the long run.
Here are a few things to consider:
1. After being with your friends for so many years, you're suddenly put into a new place with new people and new expectations and new freedoms and new responsibilities. Building friendships may take time. In fact you may notice that the friends that you have at the end are completely different from the ones you had before. Give youself time. Deep friendships are cultivated over years. Don't try to rush it.
2. Try to get to know people and their experiences. Often we look for friends with the desire to overcome our loneliness. That can feel rushed and overwhelming. Good relationships are built out of a genuine desire to know others, free of limiting judgements.
3. We all try to evaluate ourselves based on other people's reactions. At the bottom of it, when you don't feel close to anyone, do you fear that you're not smart/funny/interesting/ any other conditions enough.
4. When we don't lije and accept ourselves for who we are, we think that others feel the same about us. Which is why we are constantly needing reassurance from others.
5. Try to bulid your self worth. Writers like Brene Brown and Carol Dweck have done great work in this area. I would highly urge that you listen to their podcasts. It will help you gain insight into how to build healthy self love and self confidence.
6. You'll be able to build healthy deep relationships if you are feel confident. Try to focus on building thag.
I hope this helps.
