what happen wid u

Hey! Thanks for reaching out. I am sure you must be experiencing it from a long time and feeling uncomfortable about it. Do you mind sharing what bothers you?

I think my school is the one which has given me most of my depression. Although there are many other reason which caused me this stage in my life where I can't live a day without being sad or feeling helpless. I was heard people saying leave those things which makes you sad but everything around me makes me sad because my surrounding is the same as before. I am still here,where i have experienced most of my bad moments, days, years.Al I of a sudden every bad vibes just bounces back in my head leaving me shattered. The thing is i don't cry because of which happened I cry because of that feeling that i got facing those. My parents loves me alot but i don't share that bond with them where I can tell them everything that I am feeling. They think I am too small to understand the severity of life, but I am capable enough to know what to feel and to figure out what is wrong and what is right.According to them I can't have opinion. What they believe that is correct for them. actually this problem is faced by most of the indian teenagers. I am not saying my parents are bad but I do think that if they have't done this earlier i am way better than this right now.

* I would have been a lot better

I can understand. We are generally not given due importance during the teenage years and everything is just treated as a part of growth process, you are either very old for them or still too young for few things. This age brings a lot of confusion, issues and regrets. Have you tried politely talking to your parents about how you feel. Who do you share your feelings with, is there anyone you are close to?

I don't know how to frame what I am feeling in words. ya I have few people close to me, but i don't think they are going to understand any of it. I tried few times but it felt like they don't even try to understand what I am saying according to them they knows best. I don't like how they judge others in fact they judge me for having a opinion. They doubt my conscience. I sometimes feel so lonely thinking about the fact that I have not a single person who share the same energy as mine, who can understand me like no one does. I have a big sister but she is also like my parents. They say we are your friends you can share everything with us. i am like hahaha what a contradiction.

I made some mistakes but I don't consider them as mistakes since my family members think it's all a mistake. i was a good student, teachers used to like me, I had a good amount of friends not close but still I had many. I was good at studies, I was a quite child, you can call me an introvert

*quiet

so in my mid 11th standard i kinda start liking a guy and eventually he became my boyfriend. No we didn't do anything wrong. He is a nice person as well as he is mature too.

so obviously I didn't tell my parents and sister about it

not because I don't want to tell them just because they will not consider it good aur shabashi denge mughe.

as I said I was always a good student and a good daughter. so they didn't expect this from me. before I used to be a scared child. Now I am a grown up kid and like to have opinion of my own. but before I was controled by people I used thing only about izzat of mine at that time. I used to think ye kardiya to ye kya bolenge vo kardiya to kya hoga. and as you can understand teachers started discussing about me and him in staff room.

one of my teachers is a friend of my mother

she told everthing to my mother.infact she used to scold me in front of my mother against corridor

my mother started feeling ashamed of me