i feel so heavily guilty all the time, i recently caught up with my ex after 4 years and I've made strict boundaries between us as acquaintances but whenever he's on my mind i can't help but feel guilty for not studying properly and inviting even more distractions. sometimes i wish i never met him. my past is running my future. it should've stopped 4 years ago. this guilt eats me up alive to the point where i can't breathe.