My gf broke up with me 2 years ago, and I'm still not over with. Sometimes I'm very functional sometimes I'm not. We had on offs within 1st year after breakup,initial reason was she lost interest in me for some reasons(I think,I became less manly that time,I was behaving cry baby and very insecure and non confident, she was interest in another guy), I begged for next 3 months she ignored, but suddenly became overly loving again, she stayed like that 4 months but later I again dropped the topic of breakup and since then she is refusing till now. now lately we had legitimate break, not spoke with her since long time. I came to know something about her, she wanted to enjoy life and have fun but not with me, she said somewhere, before marriage I want to enjoy a lot try many guys, and settle with someone with stable life and finance . I'm feeling sick about these mindset, I want to move on, but it's haunts me think that, what if my future wife would have come from same mindset and fun