Holding up emotions for way too long

Anxiety

Depression

Hey everyone, Hope all are doing fine. I don't know how to explain this feeling but I'm really tired of people looking at me with disappointed eyes. Parents, teachers, friends, my boyfriend. I know i mess up a lot, quite too much actually but I really do try. My current mental state has physically started affecting me so much that sometimes I can't even throw a word out of my mouth no matter how hard I try. I did open up about this to my parents, so desperate that I said I'm depressed even when i don't have a diagnosis, but they cared for a few days then everything got back to normal - they refused to acknowledge it. My boyfriend talks about our future plans about our careers and I know he does this to distract me but it gets me even more stressed thinking about how will i make life decisions when i can't even get out of my bed and i don't have any time left to procrastinate about the topic either. I really just want someone to look at me and my mess and tell me I'm not a disaster. I'm sorry this got too long and it's okay if you can't help me. I understand. I really just needed a space to vent. Anyways i hope you have a great day, thanks for reading this far

sugaryMandrill8

4 Answers

Z_Zidane

I am glad you were able to express. Hang in there my friend things will be alright. You are not to be blamed for anything. You are not the reason of anyone’s disappointment. You are already doing your best. Don’t give up.

outdated

Tell your boyfriend that talking about future stresses you out. Talk to your parents again. Spend some time in the sunlight. Go for a walk. Practice mediation.

obsessedCur8

I can relate your situation with mine, the only difference is I don't have a bf. I try to make myself clear who I Am so no matter how people look at me I get to know what im supposed to be. Try talking with your bf about your problem and just make him obvious that right now all you want is a happy and satisfied present and not an unclear future. Just believe in yourself none can understand you more than your own self. Most importantly your, certainly, not a mess rather a survivor :)

notreally

Venting is the best therapy I believe it makes us force out our problems more literal and real. And you said you were procrastinating, but you did the first step overcoming that you picked your phone and wrote about it. It was you who made you realise about the mess going on in your life. But you know your mess your baggage makes you unique it makes you the person you are and forms you. Accept yourself. Look into that mirror, you might see a normal girl but I think I see a girl who came this far, fought everything. You came this far because you didn't stop trying something in you just compelled you to keep trying. If you think you are going through hell, then why just stop in hell, make your way through out. You deserve happiness.

Frustrating

help me please

how do I change for the better?