I've a very bad habit of getting violent whenever I get angry or inconvenienced by something. I shove people, break things, bang doors. But yesterday it got too dangerous for me to not do anything about it. I held my girlfriend's arm so tightly during an argument that she was in pain and later she had marks in the area. I really didn't mean to do it, I feel like I was in a daze. I feel like an abuser, I don't deserve to have any people in my life. She didn't even say anything, just quietly walked out of my house. I've lost her and I've lost myself.