I feel like no one even likes me they just pretend to do so . I get annoyed at almost everything my friends do . I don't really have a FRIEND who I can talk it out to even tho I have a lot of friends . ig they find me fake or annoying . I am mean and non cringy but I don't think I should feel bad I really want to kill my self sometimes . I really don't trust anyone . I really hope I don't die alone and find someone atleast in the end to talk to . I even have a lot of problems with my studies like I can't concentrate idk what I am going to do in my future . will I spoil my own future. idk maybe. I really find myself ugly .I just hate myself and everything I do but I still continue to do . idk if this is called depression but I am sad all the time . I am sure there are ppl out there having big traumatic experience but I feel these small thoughts of ours lead to big incident if we don't suck it up and solve . THIS IS MY FIRST TIME DOING THIS.