I relapsed

Question

I relapsed today. I hurt myself again. I thought I was doing well. I thought I was strong. I am disgusted by myself.

skylar · Answer

when and how did u do?

needyChough7 · Answer

I bite myself. At first I thought I will kill myself but fortunately or unfortunately I didn't do that

skylar · Answer

with ur teeth?

needyChough7 · Answer

yeah

lordshuk · Answer

it's okay..I have my friends too..Relapse is a part of recovery no! all you need to find how to stay abstinant  forever..Connect with people no?

needyChough7 · Answer

whom to connect with?

skylar · Answer

how does that feel? soothing or guilty?

needyChough7 · Answer

at first I felt good and then guilty

skylar · Answer

what kind of guilt? guilt of self harming or bcoz u kind it soothing?

lordshuk · Answer

You want numbers? if you want I can share..you are talking about recovery/ relapse na?

needyChough7 · Answer

@skylar because I felt it soothing

needyChough7 · Answer

@lordshuk I don't want to bother anyone

skylar · Answer

okay... why did do it,? what emotions were u feeling at that time

needyChough7 · Answer

I was feeling lonely lost. I thought I was going to kill myself

lordshuk · Answer

and you did the things? so are you feeling as if you are being around right? not lonely? problems solved?

skylar · Answer

just lonely?

needyChough7 · Answer

I just wanted to stop the voices in my mind

skylar · Answer

there it is... what were they saying ?

needyChough7 · Answer

that I deserve to be alone that I deserve to die

skylar · Answer

why do you think like that?

needyChough7 · Answer

honestly I don't know

skylar · Answer

do u believe them?

needyChough7 · Answer

yeah I do

skylar · Answer

why do u believe them?

needyChough7 · Answer

I don't know

skylar · Answer

you believe them.... and u dont know why?

needyChough7 · Answer

honestly I don't know

skylar · Answer

you need to think these things... you can't blindly believe in anything anyone or any voice says...

skylar · Answer

how long have u been suffering?

needyChough7 · Answer

18 years

skylar · Answer

what's ur age?

needyChough7 · Answer

20

skylar · Answer

so you are harming urself since u were 2?

needyChough7 · Answer

no I'm harming myself since 13 years old. but I'm suffering since 2 years old

skylar · Answer

can share ur reason?

needyChough7 · Answer

I don't like to talk about it

skylar · Answer

try seeking professional help, also try physical activities like gyming, etc - to get rid of adrenaline, and arts for soothing and distressing urself

skylar · Answer

if u feel like sharing anything , feel free to share

needyChough7 · Answer

thank you so much

needyChough7 · Answer

for hearing me

skylar · Answer

anytime @chough!

I am not fit for anyone