I want to change things in my life, I feel like I haven't been productive for the past 6 years, it's just eating into me but I just procastinate and do nothing, every month or so I get this feeling of void in my chest, like nothing is ever going to change cause I'm to fucking incompetent and laid back to make those changes, there are many things that I should have done already but haven't. I slog at work and then waste my time elsewhere watching shit on the internet and not doing any value addition to myself, I'm moderately obesse and feel like shit all day except when I'm not in my head i.e. when I have escaped my reality using the internet, I'm writing about it now but will forget about it and realise it back again in a month's time when another anxiety attack hits me...just don't know how to get out of this loop.