It hurts to share when you know no one can help you but yourself and you have been stuck with yourself all your life and you know you fucked. It's just that feeling of choking and wanting to scream at the same time that drains you. Smh. Sleep used to be peaceful but now when you close your eyes it's just thoughts consuming that you held in a day. There are many ways to end it but I generally hate pain which is funny when used to eat poison for fun as a kid when sad and pray it killed me. I know I'm not alone and many more out there like me that feels the same from many things till gone mad. I'm sorry and hope you can get some help or something worth living for.