Try to focus more on your present.

just do what you love everything bad will be gone if you think about overthinking you will overthink about that ... just do things that make you happy 😊

You're afraid of losing him that he is not loving you if he is not that interactive with you , I think you should see the base of the problem your trust over him is the one needed attention here so just think this way for an instance assume the worst that he doesn't love you anymore does that mean you are unlovable ,does it make you worthless I know you have so many dreams about that guy and you don't want to loose it so keep it chill don't bother about his love ,you give all your love to him and don't be afraid of the outcome even it goes wrong you will have the satisfaction that you gave it your all and you can be proud of what kind of person you are ,just make that guy know how much you love him and also I think you have other important things in your life just focus on that too your bond will become stronger as the days pass