Post partum depression

Depression

New mom here. Life feels terrible right now. Don't get me wrong. I love my baby. It's everyone else who keep judging and criticizing me for everything that happens. It's been a year since I slept on a stretch of three hours. In total my baby has never slept more than five or six hours a day . I mean it literally. No exaggeration. Except on days where my baby got vaccine or fever and is on medication, she's never slept on a stretch of three hours. It's taken a toll on my physical and mental health. My relationship with my husband got too bad after the birth of our baby. I understand I'm not able to spend time or physically care for him like I used to. But he has this idea of only mom being responsible for a baby. My hubby's never stayed awake one whole night to take care of our baby. So it's one year and a month I've been doing it alone. If I ask help, I get shamed saying you are a mom now, behave like one . He does help me at times. But being a parent takes 1000 times more effort and I'm left exhausted. We almost went to the verge of getting seperated. My mother in law despises me, so I'm not even going to talk about her. My mom who has to be my support system sides with the whole world except me. She physically helps take care of my baby. But the words she uses to talk to me hits worse. Always criticizing my decisions and actions, always judging, always ready to put me down infront of anyone. She accused me like a stranger would when we didn't have a baby. My lil one was born three years after marriage. Now I feel the people who should be my greatest strength are actually my biggest let down. I never want to die, I have my baby to take care of. But the thought of ending all this and disappearing from the world keeps popping often. Jeez. I'm sorry for such a big rant

DarkForest

2 Answers

wolfy

Hey new mom! Don't worry, a lot of people have a similar experience but it is a "taboo" to say it out loud that being a mom sucks and that sometimes you just dream of...well i will not say it out loud ;) I would say like this. Tell your husband to take care of a kid because you need sleep as well and your mental health as well. If he says no, well then, find a nanny. Mother in law's did her part already with raising his son so she can be a supportive grandma or not be in your life at all. Oh and with the hubby, talk about responsibilities and find out why he thinks you re the only one who should take care of the baby. Where is his father? Maybe ask his dad to tell him some advices. Oh and try to find some companies of new parents as well. It helps to get some tips about all this. You need to take care of yourself first if you want to take care of the baby. They feel anxiety so maybe this is also a reason why he does not sleep. Try to relax and forget about "supermoms". They don't exist. Get some rest, drink some nice tea and try to relax. When you will do this, life will be much easier. Good luck!

Zoya Ahmad

Hey! Thanks for reaching out. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for. Being a mom is no less than a heroic task. You have been handling things even after being of the verge of break down. This shows that this new life has brought soo much of courage in your life. I can understand how non supportive people around you have been. But I think it’s important for you to take a break. It’s important to take care of yourself as well. Can you ask for a full time house help and ask your mother to take care of your baby for a day and you take a day off?

Disclaimer:-
Nature of all the advices provided on this platform including Expert’s are for general information only because complete detailed clinical work up of individual not done. These advices in their all aspects are not substitute for Professional Medical Consultation and are not valid for MLC (Medico-Legal cases). All individuals are advised to consult nearest specialists.

ExpertBook Appointment

Unloving

Need someone to talk to!!

not able to accept my reality !!

Help