relationship issue

Question

I feel sick, because it's been 4 months since I broke up and I still feel like I'm stuck at the same girl, even though she has already moved on and is dating someone else. I was the one who ended the relationship, but now I feel like I made a mistake, and there is no going back now, life feel boring without her in it, idk what to do, any help?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I can understand :/ it's really hurtful how long were you guys together?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

did you ever feel like she was the one? Do you feel like that now?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

it must be hard, did you try rebound or dating someone else ?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

same brother, I feel you, I can't fall for or like anyone else as well, I'm stuck badly at her

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

did you guys break up 7 months back?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

exactly same in my case, it ended in August, before that on and off relationship, we also slept around to hurt each other, that was bad and toxic

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

we fought a lot and we're not compatible, but her presence is something I miss a lot

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I agree, how have you been holding up?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I used it as motivation to start meditation and also gymming

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I've been able to do it consistently for 2 months or so, but I still have bad days when I burst out and cry, i think we have to go through it

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I completely understand, it's really hard and will take a lot of time, but keep yourself busy

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

have you started any new hobby or activity?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I feel you, I want to emotionally shut myself for sometime as well, it is all too overwhelming

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

are you still in contact?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I tried contacting her yesterday, she didn't reply and directly blocked me

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

same, we weren't either for the past 2 months, then I tried contacting yesterday like a fool

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

yes same, but I stopped writing, because I couldn't stay consistent maintaining it

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

keep in mind that you should also write the good things happening in your life as well, because just writing negative will not help the process

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

what multiplied your pain brother?

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I'm trying that as well, but her memories keep getting triggered

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

that is true, I hope time heals both of us fast, and all our pain and traumas go away!

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

thanks for sharing your story, it helped

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

certainly hoping it will be alright:)

ardentorange7 · Answer

since how many days you both were together @gutturvension

ardentorange7 · Answer

can i ask why did you broke up with her

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I was with her for 7-8 months , it moved pretty fast with everything, we were almost living together even

ardentorange7 · Answer

Why did you broke up

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I broke up because I didn't feel like she was the one that time, and she got too serious and wanted engagement and stuff, I didn't want to commit, and didn't want to settle for her, even though I loved her and she loved me, but I thought I could do better, I mean I know I can do better, that's why I asked for breakup, but feelings were there, and she slept with random guys, which hurt me miserably, and gave me trust issues

ardentorange7 · Answer

since how many years you know each other

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I knew her for a year, 3 months before starting the relationship

ardentorange7 · Answer

means you thought that you may get someone better than her

ardentorange7 · Answer

its not easy to get out off those memories but sometimes we just have to accept that whatever happened happened

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I agree, I try to accept things and move on, even though some days are really bad

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

yes true, I thought I'd find someone better, which eventually I will I hope, but I didn't expect the feelings to stay for this long

ardentorange7 · Answer

even though I am dealing with same situation

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

hmm, it's hard :/ can you tell about your situation?

ardentorange7 · Answer

but that guy just left me and I dont know but its hard to accept that the person has just gone

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

just left? did the feelings go away just like that for him!

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

How long has it been? and how long was your relationship?

ardentorange7 · Answer

we were not in relationship but he was my close friend whom I used to share everything

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

oh that must be hard, when someone close leaves without any reason, did something happen?

ardentorange7 · Answer

we were in relationship for very quite days but then we decided to remain friends

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

hmm, so you guys are good friends now?

ardentorange7 · Answer

no we are no more friends

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

oh, it's alright, god heard the conversations you didn't, and he removed that person from your life, it's all for the best

ardentorange7 · Answer

yes I think he never loved me that was the reason he never stayed and never cared about me

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

when did you last talk to him?

ardentorange7 · Answer

august ending

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

hmm, do you love him? and also do you miss him from your life as a bestfriend you talked to or as a romantic partner?

ardentorange7 · Answer

no I just miss him as a bestfriend

ardentorange7 · Answer

I never had any expectations more than that but situations were getting more complex

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

hmm, is there anyone else who is as close to you with whom you share everything? Maybe a girl?

ardentorange7 · Answer

yes she is there but sometimes I just dont share with anyone because I am scared to loose I just think that what if she will left me

ardentorange7 · Answer

and for me I just had 2 friends and one has gone and one is there

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

oh okay I can understand, it sucks loosing bestfriends

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

if she is your bestfriend, then she needs you as much as you need her, so don't worry about loosing her

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

in this guys case, he might have gotten attracted because of opposite gender and made your friendship complex

ardentorange7 · Answer

He was there with me in every situation  and now whenever something happen with me I just cry and miss him and could not tell to anyone

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

don't worry, in any situation we are all here :)

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

friends come and go, it's part of life

ardentorange7 · Answer

but I always made him my first priority .I was never so much connected with anyone

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

I know :/ it's alright, you will make more friends, you will make someone else your priority who is worth it and will not leave you

ardentorange7 · Answer

yes

ardentorange7 · Answer

hope so

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

do you guys want to create a small telegram group? where we can support each other through the process?

ardentorange7 · Answer

yes we can

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

share your telegram id here, I'll make a group and add

ardentorange7 · Answer

tell me yours I will contact you

gutturalvenison6 · Answer

@second321123 contact here

Frustrating

help me please

how do I change for the better?