Stressed about exams and heartbreak because of friends
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I have wasted my 2020 and starting months of 2021 roaming in social media and doing chatting with my friends. And also stalking my crush; since childhood who has ignored me as hell. He broke up that 10years of friendship. He knew I was in love with him. Still he played with my feelings for years and at last left me as a unknown. Now it's my exam days . And I'm feeling so helpless. Because none is there for me. No family member supports me,even my father has become devilious . Everyday he reminds me of my incapabilities . They don't trust me anymore . My friends have gone . A sum total of loneliness. But now I'm more focused to studies. And I have a clear cut vision and plan. It was the rejection from my crush which made me do all those kinda stuffs. I had to connect a friend for help, because I was feeling worthless at the time of rejection . And my depression was worsening day by day. I had to keep myself away from other people and sit in dark room with dark thoughts in my head. If you'll measure the amount of tears I've shaded at that time, it may fill a tub. And I had got low bp because of lowering sodium level in my blood. Days filled with tears ,selfdoubt and dizziness .Ugh! Those days ! But by doing all these things I've wasted a crucial period of my life which could be shaped better. I know in upcoming exams my friends and also my crush will do secure satisfactory marks and I won't because I know I haven't done any hardwork. That bestie also left my side who used to support me. You know what ,success attracts everyone. When I secured good rank in my prev exams ,then these stuffs came into my life. They used to praise me in my little deeds .And now when I'm helpless and insecure they left me on road in pieces. Now I'm sitting on my study desk and writing ✍this to keep my mind free from these dark thoughts. Because none is there to listen me here. Still I've a little hope Maynot be this time, but later I will definitely crack my exam by hardwork and I'll show them my actual potential. Hope for the best 💫

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