Hi, it all started when I decided to change careers. I have an art background and due to financial problems and mental health I decided to learn programming. But it only got worse. it's not the career change that's the trigger. It's the thought that I am a unworthy peace of shit that has not done anything since it was born. I am suicidal. I started harming myself and I never did it before. I dig my nails so hard that I Punch holes in my skin. But I get the sense of relief after that. I feel empty. I just came to say this here since I'm pretending for the past three years.