this has been bothering me for a while

Question

tw ! grooming pedophilia.                       when i was 15 years old i had that friend of mine which was some years older than me and he would make sexual jokes with me which i would just go along. whenever i didnt go along they would make fun of me so i just tagged along. they got exposed later about their actions and made me defend them and try to take the blame because he constantly said she would kill herself and all that so i was scared then they got exposed for more horrible things and i stopped being their friend after that. I still feel horrible though for letting this happen to me. i always get these random memories and feel like i am a terrible person. it messes up with me alot. i just wanted to let it out here since i have been feeling more awful lately about it.

tryhard9 · Answer

you're not tho. why would you be a terrible person. you tried to defend him. it's kind of his fault for making sexual jokes to a kid.. I mean yeah many people do that while flirting, but who in their right mind flirts with an underage person when he himself is an adult. it's good that they got caught. i don't know anything about you so I can't say for sure. you could have gotten into huge trouble for associating with them. so just take it as a lesson and move on from it. try making healthy relations with good people. i know it doesn't seem as exciting or 'cool'. but trust me, I'm speaking from experience. you'll be much better off.

lovediary · Answer

yeah i know it now :( during that time it was a really bad time for me in terms of mental health so i guess maybe this added to it. i myself never took it seriously and he was like a 'trusted adult' for me so it really sucked

tryhard9 · Answer

i can't really help you other than say you this fact that. It's not your fault. you were the victim. you were a kid how were you supposed to know. so if you ever feel like you should not have let it happen to yourself then just remember. it's not your fault.  it was just an experience. a bad experience. you learned from it and you grew from it. isn't it so awesome that you came forward and are talking about it to us? i say that is growth that is maturity. you have/will turn into a real responsible adult unlike that dude.

stressedspringboy · Answer

People like that do exist.The kind who take advantage of your innocence

stressedspringboy · Answer

Don't Blame yourself you were just a piece of pawn to him

stressedspringboy · Answer

These guys are so arrogant and stupid in the end they got what they deserve

Frustrating

help me please

how do I change for the better?