People usually apply the term “mommy issues” to men who display some of the following traits and behaviors: an expectation that romantic partners will provide more than a fair share of household labor or emotional support. trust issues or difficulty showing vulnerability.
well in general context - someone who has expectations that their gf would tend their needs as a mom does to his son -kind of goes back to how they were treated in their childhood. some people sexualize it too -kind of kink.
for some people it also means having strained relationship with their mothers.
in simple terms, guy with mommy issue wants a girl similar to his mom in traits matter
sexualize their mothers?! now ain't that horrible
not the body but the traits, quality
hell no, they don't sexualize their mothers. refer to Happyguys ans.
okay... so if someone's mother is an independent female who tends have specific physical characteristics.. like let's say.. straight long hair, and always a decent attair, would mommy issues mean the child seeks a partner with same traits
what if someone had an emotionally unavailable mother?
not like that.... its more like they expect to be treated by their gfs just like their mother would tend their needs... like expecting to cook or laundry in a certain way
well these type of things are subject, it's totally depends on person mindset
do they prefer partners from same profession as their mothers?
ur second part of ques is another context of term - like having strained relationship with their mother
not really... mommy issues mostly goes more on emotional, psychological level.
okay.. is it healthy or unhealthy? I'm not quite getting the hang of it
also people use this term to refer about their strained relationship with their mother or as kink.
Usually when someone tells a guy has mommy issues that just means the guy has a different kind of emotional feeling towards women who are older/his mother herself
see there are 3 references:1) kink 2) overly attachment, expectations from their gfs to match the level of care and labor their mother did. 3) strained relationship.
I understood the 2, and 3 @skylar
for 1st ref - u can see David's and happy guy's comment.
so @recovering you asking is this things healthy or not so my answer to this: you have to be careful, some people are obsessed and some are not
okay... I'm understanding this a little. I think it's not kinda entirely wrong to be around a person who's caring and understanding (like a mommy)
but what if some guy is projecting their issues on you? would that be innocently cute or just plain unhealthy and kinda gross??
it's really subjective... goes more on psychological level(goes back to their childhood).. like imagine a grown man throwing tantrums becoz he's not getting his things done just like his mom would do for him (they do exist,just not easy to identify ). some people obsessively attached and some have strained relationship.
Have you seen the series called The Boys? It's an Amazon prime series. In that what Homelander has is called a purely gross version of mommy issues.
can elaborate on what kind of issues he would project?
I haven't seen the boys David.. and skylar I really don't know what issues the guy might have.. what actually happens is I've noticed it in my students that they connect to me in a lovely manner (i happen to be the teacher that cares) and I've never regretted connecting with any of my, children with I've noticed two students (a boy and girl) who have got obsessive over the years. which somehow has now grossed me out but I'm trying to understand.
Obsessive as in?
I can sense that they wanna connect more than just a teacher-student bond
get defensive if I talk about their peers usually bad mouth others creating a superior image of themselves in front of me.
do u think they are attracted to u in any way? it's common among teens and young adults
and I know it's weird because when I was a student, I was the nerd who connected with my teachers, and it was different. this feels different. and the most important, I can sense that they're getting obsessive over me.
not attracted. it's just weird. because the students that are attracted usually are direct about it and it's easy to cut them off but this is different I just can't explain it how
and I was wondering maybe those students had some troubled relationships with their mothers and hence connected to me instantly because I feel safe.
well it can be possible , at the same time it maybe not... try to maintain a strictly professional relationship.... what grade are they in? we had these kinda boys in our class but they used to that superior thing in more of a goofy way.
it can be just an act to connect with you
these are graduation students. kinda mature and knows their boundaries.
I realized that shivang. the problem is not that they're connecting. I welcome that. a healthy student teacher relationship I what I always strive for. you know, someone who supports you and believes in you apart from your parents. the problem is the obsession that I sense.. wanting me just for themselves (happened more than once with different genders so it confused m alot)
it can be just a act too, to show themselves as superior and better way -pick us type.... observe them for few days, keeping ur distance..
if you are feeling that than you should stay from them or make some boundaries
I have distanced myself. I wanna know what triggers such behavior you know so I can avoid such things happening in the future