i dont really know whats goin on in my mind. Thousands of feelings rushing about how i look, my face, my body. Everythng is so disturbing. Every night i think about giving my life. sometimes i feel i am really very toxic and people dont usually enjoy my company. i feel i am boring. i am good in my studies but not around people. i remember how i screwed my own birthday and made evryone upset. i remember how i cried whole night on my birthday. even in relationship i dont give 100%. i dont know whats my problem. i told my sister i am sad and she was like why are you sad? you have no reason to be sad?