Try to leave your past and focus on the present/future
One way of clearing your confusion could be accepting your past and growing out of it.
Your past is a part of your life but you don’t live there any more.
It’s better to focus on your present and shape it the way you want.
Thx for your concern
If you keep living in your past ,you are loosing your present
Don't worry everything will be okay
You should & will have to live in the past as well as to leave it. But the only difference is that take the lesson from that past & leave it like it never happened. One thing i want to tell you which is very important is that try to find that 'lesson" from your bad past incident because god wants you to, if you don't want that to happen with you again. Remember this always, best of luck 🤞.