I am an 18 year old girl. A student. My parents relationship have always been rough since my birth. I have spent kinda a lot lot of time with my maternals because of this. I was 5 when i saw my parents for the 1st time. Due to some reasons before that we weren't staying together. I was with nana nani. Now it's been real long I have been with my parents but I couldn't build up that sort of relation with them. It's messy. They fight a lot and their fight scars me at times. I can't sleep the whole night when they fight. I can't talk to them about it. They don't like me interfering in their matters. But it doesn't feel good to be here. I want to go back to my maternals but that's not possible. Also a month before I started talking to a guy and it was kinda good in the starting, I started liking him but then something happened and everything vanished. I don't feel like talking to him anymore. I realised it's not just with him. I have had a lot of temporary friendships from my childhood till date but there isn't anyone whom I can relay on completely. I lose interest in people with some time when we start coming close. And there is always a weird fear in me whenever i talk to a new person that this isn't gonna end well. A small argument disturbs me a lot, the fear of that small argument getting into a huge fight is always there. N i don't like fights. It's getting worse everyday.