Do not think of killing yourself . It's an extreme sin to God. Just focus on your life and do right things. Try to neglect negative words from other people. Focus on yourself, what are your hobbies what motivates you? Believe me. You will find your purpose. And pray to God. He listens , He might not answer you now but He's doing something. Hope this helps.
Have you tried talking to your parents about it?
How it makes you feel.
They won't listen, for them parents are always right. They never did wrong, even I tried to talk to and try to communicate with them. They will do whatever it takes to make a long list about my bad side. About why I didn't a real job, about why God put me this way, they will tell me about how bad i am and how much money they gave to me when i study. They always did this. I even pay them with my scholarship money and paid as much as I can, but they are being toxic parents all the time. But not for the other childs, I just want to leave them all alone, not even my brother or sisters care about them. I just want to take care of them but they are killing me. I've come back home because they got Covid19 last year and since that i took care of them, bought them medicine for their diabetes. Since they got covid, my sisters decided for me to be there for them, cause they cannot handle both of my parent so I came back here and stay with them while doing part time job. But right now, i just want to go from here.
Do you think that God punish me? I don't have any friend, i don't have a good job, i don't even have to someone to share this problem, do you think that God really hate me?
Many parents do not know how to be parents, mine never did and never will. I know life sucks... But I'm sure it will be worse if you commit suicide.
Work a little every day and things will go falling into place. I know it's hard to work so take it slowly and pick one or two things to do everyday, even if it's just cleaning your room, but do it! You will teach yourself how to be consistent and being consistent is better than being smart!