I'm not sure what's up with me, but these past few months I have been experiencing an elongated periods of time filled with extreme anxiety, overwhelming stress and pressure, lack of motivation to do anything, even the simplest of tasks I set out to do myself, mixed in with a healthy dose of deep desire for my life to end, all the while feeling as if every single one of my emotions are not real and an attempt of me to achieve attention even if there is no one near me and special mention to the trivial fact that I feel someone is always watching me and hence everything I do needs to be and must be a show I put on for them and not truly me. Anyways any help my way will be looked upon, mildly with kindness since I will always have that thought in the back of my head that others have double intentions at all times and one's guard should never be down.