Iam 26 year old male. As long as i can remember i always had crushesh on girl even when i was 5 year old. And when i was adult would easily get erection when girl came close to me or touch me.But this happens 5 year ago one of my male manager was looking good on that day and i noticed it but i remeber the at the same time one of my friend told me that girl you like is staring at you. So i blushed first i thought it was due to attraction toward manager but also the fact cause of that girl. I really got confused about that now. And i countinue to date woman. And 2nd incident is i was doing dumb thing so my female friend and male friend find that adorable and male friend kissed me on chick and it made me smile. I didnt thought of that again as i almost forgotten it. And i was dating woman and having crushesh on woman only. And attracted towards woman only and had passion for woman only but now i got hocd those 2 memories are haunting me.I have also always dreamed about having beautiful wife.and settiling down with her. I always felt strong desired. Toward woman. Even now in hocd when this girl i like said that she is interested in me i had these emotions like firecracker in my whole body. Like my body is lighten up. And i dreamed about marrying her.but those two memory are killinge me.i really dont want to do anything man. Even hold hand or anything like that.it just scare me.when ever those two memory came back it creates extreme anxiety.